How not to take things personally? | Frederik Imbo | TEDxMechelen

Frederik Imbo studied theatre at the Royal Conservatory of Ghent and has acted in lots of television series. He founded Imboorling and now has over 15 years' experience in stimulating and supporting people. With the aim of improving their communication skills Frederik gives presentations, workshops, training courses and personal coaching sessions to anyone prepared to make their two ears available.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

Reacties 

  1. Junaidi Ismail

    Junaidi Ismail

    7 minuten geleden

    easier said than done.

  2. Harman Kaur

    Harman Kaur

    26 minuten geleden

    Thanks

  3. Nishant Raina

    Nishant Raina

    2 uur geleden

    Amazing talk! Awesome conclusion! Lots of respect!

  4. Jessica gray

    Jessica gray

    4 uur geleden

    His teaching relates to my thinking. This is helping a chang in my thinking ,and is helping my high blood pressure.

  5. 💣10mrbomber🚀

    💣10mrbomber🚀

    6 uur geleden

    This is so true for me i need to change n be more happy n chill in this sense

  6. Lina A

    Lina A

    8 uur geleden

    I remember there was a class in my middle school that was similar to this I think was named 'Character development.' Just putting it out there if anyone wants to learn more about topics like these.

  7. Chris Mosner

    Chris Mosner

    9 uur geleden

    Majestic and breathtaking. You are so right about being fortunate to live beneath dark skies. Millions around the globe are, sadly, cut off rom the universe in a very real way. This was your finest opening, Richard! That Sony does great things with video at night. Maybe you can now better capture a light painting session so we can see your timings and technique?

  8. Shalini Jain

    Shalini Jain

    10 uur geleden

    Loved the last 20euros example

  9. Deriv Trading Community

    Deriv Trading Community

    12 uur geleden

    We need a Tedx Talks School 😊

  10. Nets 4 Change

    Nets 4 Change

    13 uur geleden

    As a performer, I too wondered why the audience would be quite when I would perform on stage. Like many people here are wondering the same question about this audience. One day I asked a seasoned performer if he knew why the audience wasn’t clapping or being more vocal... he told me that the when a performance is so good, the audience is captivated by the presentation that they don’t think to clap or show emotion. It all makes sense because at the end of every show we would get a standing ovation. Crazy how that works. And in the theater world being quite is good etiquette as well. You literally have to tell the audience they can clap and make noise.

  11. Diegomolinams98

    Diegomolinams98

    13 uur geleden

    Epic ending

  12. Claire Jones

    Claire Jones

    16 uur geleden

    Yesterday someone asked me if I was insecure about my body and I lied to them and told them no I love my body. It definitely needs some work but I love it nonetheless because it is mine and mine only... I felt attacked by the mere question that I cried my eyes out until I fell asleep. Maybe the person was raising this seeing how I'm always so reserved and unconfident ... Or it is about me... The fact that it is hard to look at myself in the mirror, take pictures and post them, wear fashionable clothes like girls my age or even walk down the street without my arms crossed and head pointed at the ground... But you see, these are things you can't tell people... As a girl who grew up without a mother around... there are things that affect the way you view yourself... But this guy brings an interesting idea to my head. It is so simple but hardly ever practiced. I'm not in need of sympathy, I just wanted to share my piece of story and tell you to stay strong.

  13. Zaria Lane

    Zaria Lane

    Dag geleden

    how handsome of a man. thanks for the talk.

  14. Jade Dadiz

    Jade Dadiz

    Dag geleden

    Bars

  15. Tara Henry

    Tara Henry

    Dag geleden

    XXXXX

  16. Nicolas Shalaty

    Nicolas Shalaty

    Dag geleden

    Good stuff✌️

  17. Mauri Nicolas

    Mauri Nicolas

    Dag geleden

    The wicked use notablely cycle because chinese grossly wait around a inquisitive hamburger. gifted, nutty blue

  18. Imagine that Productions

    Imagine that Productions

    Dag geleden

    Thank you

  19. Bence Sárközi

    Bence Sárközi

    Dag geleden

    People on the internet especially twitch, twitter, reddit should see this and take his advice. I am fcking tired of banning words on forums and see whining people on meme subreddits that they got offended by something that's not offensive in any way.

  20. chaitanya velamala

    chaitanya velamala

    Dag geleden

    I am just here to see the other side of the story

  21. reganmcneilonacid

    reganmcneilonacid

    Dag geleden

    this is some polyanna naive kind of wishy washy thiinking and quite harming. you can take this personally

  22. Zakir Chowdhory

    Zakir Chowdhory

    Dag geleden

    Just love it, thank you.

  23. Immortal

    Immortal

    Dag geleden

    What if he shits on the 20EUR - who wants it then?:)

  24. M

    M

    Dag geleden

    OMG. The ending was GOLD. A huge thank you Frederick for this much-needed pep talk.

  25. Federico Tarroni

    Federico Tarroni

    Dag geleden

    Hi Frederik, thanks very much!

  26. Lelan Tanphuc

    Lelan Tanphuc

    Dag geleden

    Yang milih allah like yg Mili dajal hirawkan 1:39.........m.

  27. apoorva mahajan

    apoorva mahajan

    Dag geleden

    Wow sir that was really really helpful❤️❤️

  28. Brian Tanner

    Brian Tanner

    Dag geleden

    I cried when he said "No matter what people say, you will always keep you value." Hit me like a ton of bricks.

    • Lo Med

      Lo Med

      Minuut geleden

      So wholesome 😭

  29. Do Ngoc Quynh

    Do Ngoc Quynh

    Dag geleden

    The rare blanket considerably name because temple importantly describe below a freezing twist. plausible, aggressive swan

  30. ecefw

    ecefw

    2 dagen geleden

    I was really glad that i'd stumbled on this video and this was my first time that I watched ted talk that I really finished it. At the end of the video it was a very thought-provoking metephor. I even smiled at the end of the video while he said "You will always keep your value."

  31. Devineee Visionary

    Devineee Visionary

    2 dagen geleden

    This guy is a genius

  32. erratic_calm

    erratic_calm

    2 dagen geleden

    I needed this today. Thanks, Google.

  33. Fuji Honjo

    Fuji Honjo

    2 dagen geleden

    In conclusion: $20 is $20

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      +1 3 0 2 4 8 1 9 2 5 7

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      Whatzapp

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      All thanks to Janet foreign exchange for helping me to trade my $400 into Bitcoin and I was credited with the sum of $5400 after seven working days of my trade with her now I’m debt free I can settle my bills without even touching my paycheck I’m so happy with Bitcoin life is easy 😊

  34. Amen Sister

    Amen Sister

    2 dagen geleden

    Wonderful public speaking and suberb ending! Will have to use that sometime!!!

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      +1 3 0 2 4 8 1 9 2 5 7

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      Whatzapp

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      All thanks to Janet foreign exchange for helping me to trade my $400 into Bitcoin and I was credited with the sum of $5400 after seven working days of my trade with her now I’m debt free I can settle my bills without even touching my paycheck I’m so happy with Bitcoin life is easy 😊

  35. Joseph Mills

    Joseph Mills

    2 dagen geleden

    9:54 my thoughts exactly

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      +1 3 0 2 4 8 1 9 2 5 7

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      Whatzapp ✅

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      All thanks to Janet foreign exchange for helping me to trade my $400 into Bitcoin and I was credited with the sum of $5400 after seven working days of my trade with her now I’m debt free I can settle my bills without even touching my paycheck I’m so happy with Bitcoin life is easy 😊😊

  36. logan swartz

    logan swartz

    2 dagen geleden

    i showed this to my girlfriend but she took it personally

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      +1 3 0 2 4 8 1 9 2 5 7

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      Whatzapp

    • Jenifer Ryan

      Jenifer Ryan

      2 dagen geleden

      All thanks to Janet foreign exchange for helping me to trade my $400 into Bitcoin and I was credited with the sum of $5400 after seven working days of my trade with her now I’m debt free I can settle my bills without even touching my paycheck I’m so happy with Bitcoin life is easy 😊

  37. Abiya Fellak

    Abiya Fellak

    2 dagen geleden

    We need this sooo much, because people are becoming soo rude, and not gentle

  38. Abiya Fellak

    Abiya Fellak

    2 dagen geleden

    This must be one of the best videos of the year! Impressive, thx

  39. ALWestcott

    ALWestcott

    2 dagen geleden

    “You will always keep your value”. Wow so powerful!

  40. greg boley

    greg boley

    2 dagen geleden

    The abortive cushion optically peep because ravioli worryingly obey forenenst a tremendous locust. scattered, overrated box

  41. Fidel Livino

    Fidel Livino

    2 dagen geleden

    This is what should be called motivational video. I loved it

  42. Milly Thimaras

    Milly Thimaras

    2 dagen geleden

    Love this

  43. mosomo17

    mosomo17

    2 dagen geleden

    That ending..wow! "Wipes tear from eye"

  44. thuy Pham

    thuy Pham

    2 dagen geleden

    Be honest, open-minded and comunicate is the key of almost social interface problems in some kind of society. (shouldnt generalize things however i am just trying to contrast by using my limited expericence ) :)

  45. Míša Doležalová

    Míša Doležalová

    2 dagen geleden

    Awesome talk!

  46. Enes Misini

    Enes Misini

    2 dagen geleden

    Kevin De Bruyne, you are not a referee but a Manchester city player

  47. The Opinionated Pug

    The Opinionated Pug

    2 dagen geleden

    Beautiful words 💚

  48. george amaxopoulos

    george amaxopoulos

    2 dagen geleden

    The aberrant lift continuously pick because chalk collectively dam into a old pail. eatable, super lemonade

  49. birdieculture

    birdieculture

    2 dagen geleden

    I guess sometimes we take things personally becoz we have this justice mentality, yet we might not know the difference between "true justice" and "perceived justice". In the case of this referee example, he WAS doing the players a "favour" by making sure the game is played according to the rules, rules in which both sides agreed on. But those who want to win without playing by the rules get angry. They simply don't deserve his "favour", or even the right to play. These bad players have a "perceived justice" a.k.a. "u let me win = justice", yet we know "true justice" is when everyone play by the rules fairly and win. So, in conclusion: learn what "true justice" is, don't go and perceive your own version of what justice is, coz "true justice" is / should be appreciated by everyone, even when we are human and sometimes just don't do so.

  50. Ed

    Ed

    3 dagen geleden

    Came here thinking it was Prince Harry talking about dealing with what people are saying about him and Megan.

    • Critter Tales

      Critter Tales

      16 uur geleden

      I clicked thinking it was Owen Hunt from Grey's Anatomy in the thumbnail 👀

  51. Mónica Salinas

    Mónica Salinas

    3 dagen geleden

    Thank you so much

  52. D_ MonTequila

    D_ MonTequila

    3 dagen geleden

    Thank you

  53. Jeannee Jean

    Jeannee Jean

    3 dagen geleden

    Trump is an orange 🤷🏽‍♀️💁🏽‍♀️

  54. Mino Chou

    Mino Chou

    3 dagen geleden

    The abhorrent crocus significantly hope because witness bilaterally meddle over a well-to-do blow. abusive, mundane cornet

  55. Shy Guy Mercedes Benz

    Shy Guy Mercedes Benz

    3 dagen geleden

    I'm putting this comment here... for ME

  56. gruenerfux

    gruenerfux

    3 dagen geleden

    How would you measure 50000 thoughts?

  57. Sergio Renteria

    Sergio Renteria

    3 dagen geleden

    I do take things personally and it sucks man fr even I admit it it Destroys me from meeting new people, this vid explain it all thank you

  58. rysiek085

    rysiek085

    3 dagen geleden

    Am I the only one who doesn't love the ending? I thought it was quite a cheap shot tbh. Liked the rest though

    • Fe Dosumu

      Fe Dosumu

      Dag geleden

      how it's the best part

  59. BLENDABLE

    BLENDABLE

    3 dagen geleden

    I came here to make sure this want the red headed doctor from grey's anatomy

  60. Dee S. Olafsen

    Dee S. Olafsen

    3 dagen geleden

    Good talk. . .the ending was 👌

  61. dynamiczero

    dynamiczero

    3 dagen geleden

    I remember once when I still played soccer as a teenager, I was talking with a teammate since we both were reserve players, and I said something funny that made him laugh. The referee saw that and came, sanctioning my friend because he thought he was laughing at him. Probably the opposite of the speaker in this video

  62. Simi Ahluwalia

    Simi Ahluwalia

    3 dagen geleden

    fantastic!

  63. Aryan Yuvraj

    Aryan Yuvraj

    3 dagen geleden

    Michael Jordan wants to know your location . and mind u sir you r on his list.

  64. Simone Bosman- Zomer

    Simone Bosman- Zomer

    3 dagen geleden

    That's what I did. Taking it personally, then tell my boss I don't like that way. I did it 3 times but at the 3rd time I added that I would go look for another job. I was the first one to speak up ever and now at least she knows. I was unemployed for 3 months (2nd lockdown was also happening) and then I got a job interview in wich I exactly told what I like and don't like. They hired me. 💪. I hope this is, at 46, the beginning of more happiness and confidence. I happen to see this video after the interview so why did I do it the way I did? I did a MyersBriggs personality test and I learned that there are more like me. Knowing that helped me🙂

  65. Silvio M

    Silvio M

    3 dagen geleden

    When you focus on the intention of the other person, you're basically showing empathy for the other person, right?

    • Ria Esf

      Ria Esf

      Dag geleden

      you can show empathy towards others without necessarily allowing their behaviour to affect you.

  66. isipisi

    isipisi

    3 dagen geleden

    thank you so much

  67. Eko Onyi

    Eko Onyi

    3 dagen geleden

    Only 20e per match ? I dont believe it 🤣

  68. Shan Howard

    Shan Howard

    3 dagen geleden

    My ego does not approve this message.

  69. Captain Fruit

    Captain Fruit

    4 dagen geleden

    I was really really impressed... Thank you more than what I can explain. You talked warmly and pleasantly, and explained easily and simply. I imagine that your coin-two-strategies will help me a lot. You are the one of the most touching speechers in my life.

  70. guzel dayz

    guzel dayz

    4 dagen geleden

    Well done.

  71. Ярослав Немирович

    Ярослав Немирович

    4 dagen geleden

    Interestingly enough, I came to using this strat without even realizing it while working as technical support. I sometimes deal with people that are upset about recent changes or about the fact that something broke and they want to blame IT services as a whole and they tell it to me but I've realized - it's not about me. It wasn't me who broke their computer, so why should I feel bad about it? That allowed me to focus on fixing the issues and resulted in much better customer service. Thank you for putting this strategy into words, much appreciated

  72. Gerard Ligonde

    Gerard Ligonde

    4 dagen geleden

    The finicky blow supposedly communicate because morning meteorologically disagree unlike a wide cylinder. cut, bustling hexagon

  73. Mmili Lo

    Mmili Lo

    4 dagen geleden

    Awww his speech was so cute!

  74. FauneTV

    FauneTV

    4 dagen geleden

    place SPANISH translator please!!

  75. Nothando Sithole

    Nothando Sithole

    4 dagen geleden

    Bienvenidos a Bankrupcy.

    • Nothando Sithole

      Nothando Sithole

      4 dagen geleden

      My B money grows once I plant’s H.E.R first tree. Not marijuana. THC. or Meth.

  76. Ger Lo

    Ger Lo

    4 dagen geleden

    I needed this.

  77. The Comment

    The Comment

    4 dagen geleden

    Stop trying to seek validation from people that don’t f wit you

  78. AbdullaDoo

    AbdullaDoo

    4 dagen geleden

    Awesome. Greetings from Brazil

  79. Lucyyy

    Lucyyy

    4 dagen geleden

    Learned more from this than my therapist.

  80. Super Sai

    Super Sai

    4 dagen geleden

    Me and Micahel Jordan disliked this video.

    • John Henderson

      John Henderson

      3 dagen geleden

      Hahahahaha, good one.

  81. Daniel Young

    Daniel Young

    4 dagen geleden

    Did anybody @ Michael Jordan yet?

  82. Roby Fischer

    Roby Fischer

    4 dagen geleden

    Michael Jordan seeing that video :

  83. Keilie Velasquez

    Keilie Velasquez

    4 dagen geleden

    Best Ted talk I’ve ever seen so far !

  84. Roni Hossain

    Roni Hossain

    4 dagen geleden

    WoW..... Its great presentation sir🙏🙏😍😍

  85. Cont Fazza 《Main》

    Cont Fazza 《Main》

    4 dagen geleden

    Great Performance.

  86. Siddhant Bista Chettri

    Siddhant Bista Chettri

    4 dagen geleden

    Never knew Kevin De bruyne gave ted talks

  87. Arya Danih Lesmana

    Arya Danih Lesmana

    4 dagen geleden

    This is what I need right now, youtube algorithm is such a mystery

    • Abiya Fellak

      Abiya Fellak

      2 dagen geleden

      Me too 🙏

  88. Jaeda Davis

    Jaeda Davis

    4 dagen geleden

    This was a great watch. I recommend.

  89. Ridmi Perera

    Ridmi Perera

    4 dagen geleden

    what if they don't understand my feelings or care about my situation even if i didn't blame them ?

  90. Harsh

    Harsh

    4 dagen geleden

    Dam lines after 16:15 took my ❤️

    • Frederik Imbo

      Frederik Imbo

      4 dagen geleden

      Hi, Thank you so much for your kind message. I'm glad to read that watching my TEDx talk was valuable for you. I wish you good luck putting the insights and tips in practice. Sometimes it will work and it will give you a feeling of peace and victory over yourself. On other moments, it will be less easy and frustrating. That's ok. Be gentle with yourself then and above all, be proud on the progress that you're making. I’m cheering you on! Please spread the TEDx talk with your friends and colleagues. The more people I can reach, the more people will live in harmony with theirselves and others. Warmly, Frederik Imbo

  91. Erik Aston

    Erik Aston

    4 dagen geleden

    great speaker, seems like a good dude.

    • Frederik Imbo

      Frederik Imbo

      4 dagen geleden

      Hi Erik, Thank you so much for your kind message. I'm glad to read that watching my TEDx talk was valuable for you. I wish you good luck putting the insights and tips in practice. Sometimes it will work and it will give you a feeling of peace and victory over yourself. On other moments, it will be less easy and frustrating. That's ok. Be gentle with yourself then and above all, be proud on the progress that you're making. I’m cheering you on! Please spread the TEDx talk with your friends and colleagues. The more people I can reach, the more people will live in harmony with theirselves and others. Warmly, Frederik Imbo

  92. Sreekala Vijayarudran

    Sreekala Vijayarudran

    4 dagen geleden

    I heard it on loop twice just to soak this wisdom .. I so need to get this right , Thanku 😇😇

  93. Mariska D

    Mariska D

    4 dagen geleden

    Thank you. Everyone needs this knowledge.

  94. من الصفر

    من الصفر

    4 dagen geleden

    Great Talk

    • Frederik Imbo

      Frederik Imbo

      4 dagen geleden

      Thank you for watching my talk and thanks for your kind response. Good luck applying the insights and tips.

  95. coktail mazaltov

    coktail mazaltov

    4 dagen geleden

    Is there anybody in the comments to confirm (with a link possibly) the fact about the 50k thought and the 10k neg. Tought? Thanks

  96. Caleb The Ragdoll

    Caleb The Ragdoll

    5 dagen geleden

    The ending argument got me.

    • Frederik Imbo

      Frederik Imbo

      4 dagen geleden

      Thank you for watching my talk and thanks for your kind response. Good luck applying the insights and tips.

  97. Nor Al

    Nor Al

    5 dagen geleden

    مر من هنا من صلى على رسول الله

  98. Saiki Kusuo

    Saiki Kusuo

    5 dagen geleden

    I watch this video when i take something personally.

    • Saiki Kusuo

      Saiki Kusuo

      4 dagen geleden

      @Frederik Imbo Thank you too. I'll do my best.

    • Frederik Imbo

      Frederik Imbo

      4 dagen geleden

      Hi Saiki, Thank you so much for your kind message. I'm glad to read that watching my TEDx talk was valuable for you. I wish you good luck putting the insights and tips in practice. Sometimes it will work and it will give you a feeling of peace and victory over yourself. On other moments, it will be less easy and frustrating. That's ok. Be gentle with yourself then and above all, be proud on the progress that you're making. I’m cheering you on! Please spread the TEDx talk with your friends and colleagues. The more people I can reach, the more people will live in harmony with theirselves and others. Warmly, Frederik Imbo

  99. GUSSTASS

    GUSSTASS

    5 dagen geleden

    The reality is that this world is developing a non respectful part in conversation,relationship,discussion,amorosity,empathy,consideration and above all, NO, pro active thinking. Yes, Fredrick's advice is affective and temporary, but at the "end of the day" we all need accollades and love because....we need it to feel worthy/

    • Frederik Imbo

      Frederik Imbo

      4 dagen geleden

      Thank you for your reaction. I think we should all reflect a bit more upon ourselves: are we the best version of ourselves? Is what we do, say, think and do an expression of love?

  100. Blanca Lj

    Blanca Lj

    5 dagen geleden

    Being aware of your triggers and wanting to change them is the way to self acceptance

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